Audience my Readers am here to present a joke called 'my joke collections' WELCOME

(1) Since José Mourinho left Chelsea in 2007. Chelsea have won 7 trophies and Arsenal have won 0." (2) When you scream God's name during sex, I wonder if you're trying to remind Him to punishu later." (3) The day a Ghost got involved in an accident was the day i stopped watching Nollywood." (4) What's the relationship between Rain & KPLC in Kenya? It seems almost like an automatic switch thing.. (5) Someone walks up to u drinking Johnnie Walker and tells u to help him with Transport-fare cos he's Stranded..pls shoot Him!" (6)He did the Exam so well that He Took the Answer Scripts Home to show His Room-mates" (7) That awkward moment when you type "Trophyless" on Google and the result shows "Arsenal""­ (9) Sweat from somegirls' armpits can turn blue litmus paper red." (10) If your Girlfriend refusesto accept the Bible & anointing oil or Qu'ran as Vals gift, free her, she's WITCH" (11) They say love is more important than money. Pls try paying a nairobi conductors with a hug and see (12) In a Kisii Home... If your friend forgets to greet your parents, that's the end of that friendship. If you agree" (13) Women are like police, they might have all the evidence in the world but they still want a confession!" (14) People That Smoke Weed Before Going To Church. You Wanna Compete With The Most High?" (15) In a Luhya Home, ur parents will call u frm ur room to pick up something that is sitting literally 2 inches away from them. (16) If God's Plan For You is BROWN TEETH, Even IRON SPONGE Cannot Change It!" (17) If 5k brazilian hair couldn't get you a good husband, why not use it to pay a counselor to talk good sense into your life?" (18) Ushers yawa.. They won't allow one to sleep comfortably during service.. Thought the house of God is also my father's house?" (19) The hot girl next to me in class just fell asleep. Maybe I should fall asleep too..so I can tell my friends I slept with her?" (20)WHITE KID: "Shut Up Dad"!!; *Dad shuts up* DAD- *Shut too* Kenya KID: "Mzae, Shut up" *dad wakes up*....where am i?....DOCTORs room" (21) A slap is a manual over ride mechanism used to rectify a person acting like a fool.....no one is above a manual reset." (22) Some Ameru people with their names though, how can you be naming identical twins "Praise and Worship"?" (23) U opend Ur legs &he bought U BOLD 5, U opend 4 anotha guy & he paid for Ur credo. Pls open 4 me too, lemme buy U the Charger." (24) And So, I was watching a naija movie...and this Guy shot himself in the head THRICE...ewoo!!" (25) Someone Blocked His Dadon facebook, the Dad also Blocked Him from entering the House. (26) One rapper just said"My blood is so full, call me 'bloody fool'".......Why lord? (27) U can't recite a Bible Passage! but u can mention 68 Hotels & Clubs in Nairobi without thinking? My Sista, ur life is blinkin on a low ba3!" (28)Marrying a lady whose cooking skills can only be compared to Victor Pifwoli's English is suicide." (29) All women MUST get married! No man should go unpunished!" (30) Its only a Kisii Father that Prices School Fees!" (31) You try to call your GF from a public call centre on her street, and Her number appears as 'Sweet Heart' u dead